Saving Ginny Weasley
by Sans Amour
Summary: After the death of her best friend, Ginny is lost in a world of pain and confusion. She sets herself down a one way path of self destruction to ease the pain. She cant save herself anymore.
1. Chapter 1

Saving Ginny Weasley

No one realized how much he meant to me. No…. no one realized at all. I think I may have even been closer to him then Harry. All those days spent in that house, the twins were buys in their own world, and I was ignored by the Gold trio as per usual. Its not that they wanted to ignore me, but like the twins they were in their own world, one they thought to be too dangerous for me.

So I spent my days in Grimmauld place in the company of Sirius Black. I loved talking to him, over and over again. He was so interesting. He was unlike any other person I had ever met. I loved him, he made life easy for me. He was like the best friend I'd always wanted. I didn't care about the age gap. I wanted to be with him forever, because he was infact my best friend. And I hoped I was his.

When I lost him, I went into shock. I refused to believe it was true. No one knew how close we were. No one. When he died I didn't shed a tear. I didn't, not one. I was too upset. I was too upset to make sense of what was going on. I felt numb and detached, and I stayed that way.

When I found out about what happened my first reaction was 'it's a lie' I hadn't seen it happen while we had been fighting. I was frantic, asking everyone where Sirius was. No one had the fucking guts to tell me. Finally, Lupin looked sadly into my eyes and said, "He's dead Ginny." I ran from the house. I didn't look back. I didn't run infront of them of course, I slowly walked out of the room then ran. I ran outside passed every house into the middle of the city and it was the middle of the night. I screamed and screamed over and over. I could feel a knife being stuck in my chest over and over again. I couldn't break. I was dying. I found a real knife. I slashed my arms everywhere, my legs too. It felt better.

I went back to Hogwarts of course. I wasn't going to just loose everything that Sirius had helped me gain. But I just couldn't be myself without him. Sure, I knew that one day I would be without him, but I didn't expect it to be so soon. I mean, this was just so unexpected, so…. So wrong. That's why I couldn't move on, because it was wrong.

Everyone had noticed a changed in me, but I didn't care. Why should I? They weren't Sirius. And they didn't care about me anyways, and I promised myself I would never care again. It hurt all too much to lose. Better to have loved and lost then not loved at all? What a stupid thing to say. Who ever said that should be hit, hard. They obviously never lost someone who meant everything to them…. Someone who was there entire world basically.

There had to be something to make the pain go away. There was a whole in my chest and it was bleeding all over the floor. I turned to the muggle world in search of comfort and I found it. I'd heard of drugs, sure, but it was uncommon for a person of the wizarding world to get involved in them.

I started off small, with marijuana. It calmed be down. It made me forget about Sirius, but the effects weren't strong of long lasting enough for me, and that giant hole in my chest would open up wider once the high wore off. It was like betraying Sirius. I know he wouldn't have wanted me to do anything like this, so I just did more drugs. To forget. To forget how to feel, to forget about him. That's all I had to do, forget. I could be happy again if I just forgot.

By the time I went back to Hogwarts I was on amphetamines daily. I couldn't get threw the day without them, besides people didn't except anything that odd. No one paid much attention to me anyways. I didn't think I would go past this point. That was until; the years first visit to hogsmeade. There was a whole part of the wizarding world I had never witnessed.

I walked down the road into the small village with Luna, her hand in hand with her boyfriend Blaise Zabini. I think if Sirius were here he would give me a piggy back ride and I would be laughing and smiling while he smiled just slightly, happy that I was happy. I cleared my thoughts immediately, but there were still lingering thoughts of Sirius that I chose to ignore. It was very busy, seeing as it was the first trip of the year. There were a lot of happy third years running around, this being their first trip there.

Me, Blaise and Luna stopped at the Hog's head, seeing as all other places were busy. I got coffee. Coffee was good for me. I was barely paying attention, but I was snapped out of my own thoughts as I noticed that Draco Malfoy had come over and struck up a conversation with Blaise. While I thought none of them were looking I poured some bailey's into my coffee. I saw Draco's eyes flicker my way. Oh well, it was just Draco. Like he gave a fuck. I bet he'd encourage me.

I got sick to hell of the pointless conversation they were having. Had life always been this vain? Maybe it was just my new perspective on life, and I was seeing things in a clearer way. But right now, I was too happy to be disgusted. Sometimes I wonder why I took things like speed and E. I didn't want to be happy anyways.

I abruptly stood up and pushed my chair, heading for the bathroom, almost skipping. I could feel Draco's eyes on my back. Once in the bathroom I washed my face. I felt disgusted. I had long since lost any reason to care about my appearance. I sat in the bathroom smoking for awhile (not cigarettes, obviously) and I watched with wide eyes as three girls who obviously didn't go to Hogwarts walked in. They all looked dead, yet completely alive at the same time. There clothes were dirty and they looked well, like the homeless people I'd seen on the streets of London. I watched as the girls proceeded to take a white substance, make lines with it and snort it. It was like I wasn't even here, but I continued to watch curiously. One of the girls, that had the white powder smudge on her upper lip, looked up at me like noticing me for the first time. "Wanna try?" She asked.

'Why not?' I thought. "What is it?" I asked coming closer. I was still fairly unfamiliar with the drug world, just trying whatever I came by and easily allowing myself to become hooked on it.

The girl smiled and said "It's coke. You'll love it." She said. I'd observed them enough to know what to do. The girl handed me a rolled up bill and a sniffed a line. I felt the effects nearly immediately. It was hard to really describe how I felt, I was paranoid yet felt amazing, I was alert and felt as if I had just had a great nights sleep, with a lot of energy. The girl smiled at my and grabbed my arm pulling me out of the bathroom, leaving the other two girls behind. I waved like an idiot at Luna, Blaise and Draco as me and the girl left out onto the streets.

She looked at me and I looked at her and I just started laughing and so did she. I spent the rest of the day in a daze, as the two of us kept sniffing lines. When the time came around for me to leave, I was completely sketched out. The girl assured me it was nothing to worry about. Before I turned to leave she grabbed me and crushed her lips hard against mine. I'd never kissed a girl in my life. And right then, I knew this wasn't going to be the last time. She smiled and pushed me out into the main spot of the street were a bunch of Hogwarts students were heading back. I followed them, not trusting myself to get back on my own.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning I felt fine. As if yesterday had been nothing but a hallucination (which is highly possible) but I knew it was real. The way I felt yesterday was a way I had never felt on any other drug before.

Suddenly I felt the whole in my chest rip open and my conscious and morals come out. It felt like Sirius's death all over again. I could fell myself, the 'old Ginny' come out. She was screaming at me in my head.

_HOW COULD YOU DO THIS? TO YOURSELF? TO SIRIUS? _She screamed at me. I flinched.

_Shut up! Just SHUT UP! You don't understand. You just left me once Sirius died. Left me to deal with it all on my own. I didn't know what to do! I panicked, okay?_

_Then fix it. Make everything go back to normal. Make Sirius proud of you again._

_Do.NOT.Mention.His.NAME! And besides, it's too hard to go back now. I've wrecked my life, and that's it._

I sighed allowed. I was arguing with myself. I was going completely crazy. Wonderful. I pulled myself out of my bed. I wasn't as early as I usually was. People were getting up and starting to get ready. I figured I would eat first, then come back and do my usual morning routine. Plus, there would be very few people in the great hall to notice anything wrong with me so I could go down completely sober.

I slowly made my way down the steps, ignoring the odd looks I got. I looked as terrible as I felt. If I was lucky no one would notice. I could just claim to be tired. I got down into the great hall and there were two hufflepuffs at there table, a group of ravenclaws, no Gryffindors and one slyntherin.

I sat at my table, putting food on my plate, though I knew I wouldn't eat any of it. I never ate anymore, I was either too high or too upset to eat. I stared blankly at my food. Thoughts of my life since Sirius's death flooded my mind. I was failing all my classes, I was sure. I'd stopped talking to all my friends.

I was taken by surprise as someone sat down across from me. I looked up, it was Draco Malfoy. 'What the fuck does he want?' I thought bitterly. He didn't say anything as I continued to stare at him, he continued to stare at me.

I sighed. "What do you want Malfoy?" I asked. I never noticed how scratchy my voice was, how gross it sounded.

"You know what I want." He said, he glared at me. "An explanation. For yesterday."

Oh, so it wasn't a dream. Good to know. I sighed loudly, making a show out of it. "That's none of your business Malfoy."

He ignored my answer. "Don't pretend like you actually think people haven't noticed your sudden change in behavior. Others may not have, but I have. You better watch what you do Ginevra, or you might wind up dead."

After that he got up and left the great hall. I sat there for a moment, before storming out myself leaving all my food. 'HOW DARE HE!' My mind raged. How dare he talk to me like that! He didn't know anything. That stupid, insignificant ferret! I kicked the wall, and it hurt a lot. I stormed back up to the common room as a large group of Gryffindors.

I sat in my room for the first half of the day. I couldn't go to class. I need to quit with all this stuff. It was affecting me to strong. I wasn't good at quitting things, so I was just going to have to wait until everything was out of my system.

The first day I felt like shit. Everything was so bright and real and my head was spinning and I threw up three times. There were so many drugs in my system now, I couldn't even keep track of them.

I couldn't believe I had let this happen to myself. Sirius would hate me. I know he would. That's why I had to quit, to save myself and make him proud. That's what I would do.

**A/N yeah, this ones a lot shorter, oh well. Im only ginna continue if I get some reviews.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N **Yay! I got put on alerts twice Thanks to Dracoginnylover24 for the review.  
Fall-Child-08: Thanks for the review, i appreciated it. And yeah, i know what you're saying about Draco. Don't worry, there was a reason for that.

Saving Ginny Weasley

Quitting was harder then I had expected. I'd been on multiple drugs for awhile now, so I decided to limit myself. I had dropped everything except for marijuana and Ecstasy. I was generally on speed most of the time, so that was the hardest to quit, but with the E it was easier. I tried to stay away from it though, it was more addictive then marijuana.

No one noticed a change in me, although I was more relaxed and depressed then usual. I wondered about how many people had given up on me. The past little while was a complete blur, so I wasn't sure how my friends were feeling with me at the moment.

It was harder to concentrate on class, but I was learning more because my mind wasn't wondering as much. But I did notice something, with upping how much E I took, I was much happier and much kinder to people and after about a week of being on it a lot, I had become friends with a lot of students who I had never even known existed before.

"You're so fun to be with Ginny" giggled a girl by the name of Sally Brite. She was a year younger then me. I shouldn't be hanging around younger kids, I would probably influence them to do bad things.

"Yeah. You remind me of Sally's older sister, Venus." Said another girl, in my year but a Ravenclaw. Her name was Amanda Rich.

Sally's face suddenly fell into a grim look and she shot Amanda a look. Venus didn't really talk for the rest of the day. I wondered why, but I was too out of it to care.

I had too much energy to just be sitting around chatting with these girls. Suddenly, I stood up. "Let's do something." I insisted. The girls looked at me with blank faces, obviously showing that they didn't know what to do. I sighed and turned my back on them and left. I didn't have the patience for this, honestly.

I let myself wander the castle in a happy daze. I knew I would have to stop this, Hermione had already confronted me once about my sudden happiness. She wanted to know what was going on, why the sudden change of attitude. I told her I was just a happier person. I told her I had a crush, of course she assumed it was Harry, but of course it wasn't. I didn't have a crush. Never will.

I sighed as I rounded the corner and walked straight into Draco Malfoy. I hadn't even made eye contact with him since what happened at breakfast a few days ago. He knocked me straight onto my ass when I walked into him. He looked at me, glaring as per usual. He didn't offer to help me, he just continued on his way.

Seems like before he wasn't being nice. I wondered what his problem was. I skipped up to the common room, ignoring the odd looks I was getting. Yeah, I needed to stop. Seemed I was drawing attention to myself.

I got into the common room with a grin on my face, waving at the people who left. I noticed the gold trio sitting on their chairs by the fire. They looked up when they saw me and I could tell by there faces something wasn't right.

"Ginny, come here for a second" Hermione's voice was soft and caring. 'Oh bloody hell.' I thought as I dragged myself over to them, falling down into one of the chairs.

Ron went straight to the point, "What the hell is with the sudden mood change." I glared at him, thank god the effects were wearing off.

"It's none of your business _Ronald, _is it wrong for your sister to be happier?" I asked, narrowing my eyes at him. 'What an idiot.' I thought rolling my eyes.

Hermione frowned, 'it's not just that Ginny…. We've been noticing things. You're mood changes a lot… and we heard about the last Hogsmeade visit." My eyes froze on her in a glare.

"So now you're keeping tabs on me are you? Well I'll have you know its NONE of your business what I do. I was just having fun with that girl I met, that's all." At least that's what I hoped I was doing. It was a distant blur by this point.

Now it was Harry's turn to speak, he went to open his mouth, but I helped up my hand stopping him. "I don't want to hear it." I said before getting up and leaving, making a show of stomping my feet on the stairs up to the common room, because I could feel there eyes on my back.

Once in the room all the calmness and happiness I felt before was gone and replaced by depressed. I smashed everything, throwing everything. It wasn't helping me relax, I just got more and more angry, I punched the wall and split open my knuckle. I winced as I looked down and my bleeding hand. I wasn't going to be bale to fix this.

I sat in my room, smoked a joint which eased the pain and calmed me down. I would wait a bit so the golden trio would leave, then I would go see Madam Pomfrey. I sat in my room while the time elapsed, and once I felt that enough time had passed, I walked down the stairs.

Thankfully they were gone, and with a sigh of relief I left the common room and went to see Madam Pomfrey. She tsked over my hand, and bought the excuse that I fell while outside and smashed my hand against a rock. She cleaned it up, did a bit of magic and it looked fine, just bruised but she warned me not to move my hand too much.

While leaving, for the second time today I ran into that fouled faced, useless little ferret boy. I scowled at him and he glanced at my hand and chuckled to himself.

"Withdrawal symptoms are a bitch, aren't they?" He asked with an arrogant smirk before moving on down the hall way as I watched him walk away, wide eyed and open mouthed.


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry it took so long to update D  
And thanks for all the reviews everyone 3  
And everyone, just please relax about Draco, okay?  
More is explained in this chapter, and in later chapters so dont worry 

* * *

Saving Ginny Weasley

I had been clean for three weeks. It took three days for your body to stop relying on any substance, so it was just my mind that was driving me crazy. Nothing else. Half the year had passed. I was disgusted at myself because I couldn't remember most of it.

It was almost time for Christmas break, and today there was a Hogsmeade trip. I bundled up and got into a carriage with Hermione, Ron and Harry who had seemingly forgotten about my past behavior. We all chatted about school and other related things. Despite how horribly I had been feeling lately it was good to be back. And there was no more encounters with Draco Malfoy. That stupid ferret boy seemed to be keeping his distance. Thank god.

Eventually they got carried away into there own conversation and I was staring at the window. The white snow was so pretty, how to coated the ground. I suddenly felt relaxed and calm, like these past months have all just been a dream. And that's all I wanted it to be, just a dream. I sighed and closed my eyes, opening them again with a smile on my face.

The Hogsmeade trip was wonderful. I had a snowball fight with Luna and Blaise and Draco showed up to ask Blaise something, and I nailed him in the back of the head with an ice ball. Blaise burst out laughing and Draco left in a huff. Luna stared at me with her dreamy eyes and said "That was funny" Blaise laughed even more.

I saw that girl again, the one I did the lines with. She smiled that dreamy smile at me and motioned for me to follow her. I didn't. I turned away and walked back up to the castle with Luna, Blaise trailing behind us

I could feel my life changing, and for the better. 

* * *

A week later and it was time to go home for the Christmas holidays. I happily got onto the Hogwarts express. I walked around until I found an empty compartment. I thought I might end up crying, so I didn't want to be around anyone. Because I know I would remember how much fun I had last Christmas with Sirius.

Of course, I should have known I wouldn't get my own compartment. Draco Malfoy opened the door and stepped in. I waited for him to insult me. He didn't say anything. He sat down for a moment, I eyed him suspiciously.

"What do you want Draco?" I snapped.

He still remained quiet for the duration of the ride, eyeing me suspiciously. I eventually just ignored him, getting used to his presence. It was still irritating though. It started to get darker and rain started pouring hard against the train roof. It seemed as though the darkness seeped into the train itself. Ginny could barely see Draco anymore.

"Are you clean now?" I heard his voice say just before a crack of thunder. I glared at him, despite the fact that he probably couldn't even see me.

"And tell me why that's any of your business?"

"Ginerva," He started, shocking me by his use of my real name and his harsh tone, "Muggle drugs are very dangerous, and even magic can not reverse the effects of them. I would not wish the fate of heavy drug addiction on anyone, not even lowly blood traitors like yourself." And with that, he got up and left leaving me alone with my thoughts.

* * *

Christmas at the Burrow was typical. Happy, exciting and stressful. No one really noticed how depressed I had been. I stayed locked in my room for the most part, it was hard. I was still suffering, and still craving though I had past all the withdrawal symptoms.

My room seemed so small, so confined. I was sure I was going crazy. So Christmas Eve while my mother was working on dinner I announced to her I was going for a walk. She told me not to be late for dinner. I was a little more then late. I never came back.

I don't know what came over me that night. I just felt as if the life I was leading right now had nothing left for me. I felt if I wanted to me happy, I needed to find something that made me happy. I later felt as if leaving was the worst possibly decision I could make.

It was cold in muggle London and very crowded with people last minute shopping. I just wandered really. I never even planned out not coming home, just when I figured the time I was supposed to go home at, I never left. I said to myself 'Time to go home' but I just didn't. I don't know why.

I ended up in well…. A pretty sketchy area. People were looking at me funny. I didn't like the looks of this place, but oh well. I held my wand tightly. I wandered by the people, all of them dirty and rather crazy looking.

I found a spot that looked a bit cleaner and took a seat. I glared at everyone, hoping it was enough of a warning for them to stay away from me. But I heard a giggle and hands slid over my eyes. "Guess who?"


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry for the delay. School started etc.  
Hope you like this one. Most confusion will be cleared up in the next chapter  
Reviews appreciated. 

Saving Ginny Weasly

It was that girl again. I recognized her by her sparkling eyes. She took my hand, and I didn't resist even though my mind was screaming 'No! Don't go!' But I did anyways. I'm not sure why. I count it as one of my biggest regrets in life.

She dragged me threw the streets as they started to get smaller, and smaller and dark and darker. I knew this was bad. Everything in my mind was yelling at me to run. I was going to die. But for some reason the more I thought I was going to die, the less motivation I had to run away.

She had brought me to what was obviously the abandoned warehouse district. _Lovely_. I was surely go to die here, whether it was tonight or in five years, I was going to die here. Oh well. At least I wouldn't have to face the people I loved. At least they wouldn't know. They would simply think I disappeared. At least I could finally be with Sirius.

She took me into one of the smaller buildings, our hands still entwined. I saw few details of the building, as my mind was stuck in a haze. The stairs were covered in a line of burgundy carpeting. The walls had holes in them and I was fairly sure I saw a rat run threw one. I was slightly wondering why this girl was out here in muggle London, but I dismissed the thought, not really caring.

We walked up the stairs in silence, listening to the sounds of the creaking stairs. I was sure that would break and I would fall to my death, but I didn't. We walked all the way up to the top where she pushed open a door, where three people sat in silence, candles lit around them.  
The girl left me standing at the door and sat down beside her friends. She glanced back at me once, but didn't make a motion for me to come over and sit with her. I stayed at the door opening, leaning against the wall with my arms crossed across my chest.

I watched in silence and they conversed quietly. There were two guys and one girl. They all looked dirty and disgusting. I wonder if I would become like that.

They were taking quietly and glancing at me every once and awhile. I watched as the girl shook her head and the other girl nodded. One of the boys, the older one I assumed pulled out a pipe from his back pocket. I immediately recognized it as a crack pipe, this was something I immediately knew I want no part of.

I sat and watched as they all got high. "Come on, try some." The girl said, her eyes blood shot and a smile on her face. "No." I said immediately.

The girl got up and came over to me, grabbing my hand and bringing me to the circle. The older boy looked at me, straight in the eyes. "You've got a lot of pain to hide girl, I know the perfect thing for you"

I watched carefully as he pulled out a hypodermic needle. My mind drifted off as I felt him tie a band around my arm and the needle slide into my vein.

My mind began to spin and I had no idea what was going on. I felt drowsy and numb…. And… and all my pain was gone. I could think of Sirius freely without anything hurting. Without it feeling like my heart was breaking.

"Better huh?" The boy asked. His face was spinning. "Yes." I responded breathlessly. I need this. I wasn't even sure what drug this was, but I needed it. If I wanted to get through life I needed this, I knew that now.

The night passed in a haze and a blur and the next morning I felt disgusting. I started throwing up immediately and shaking. It was so cold. I looked around and the girl was gone again. I was sure I would see her again soon though. I was alone, everyone was gone. I had one thing on my mind, _drugs. _Or to be more specific, that one drug. I needed to find that boy.

With the energy I barely had left I picked myself up, and walked out onto the street, shocked by the cold. I had forgotten it was winter. I had forgotten I had feelings and I could feel the cold.

I wrapped my arms tightly around myself, no longer scared of the homeless kids wandering around, because I was one of them now. I wonder if any of them knew what that drug was.

I spent most of the day walking around. Near the end of the day, when I had given up on my search I saw him. He was with a female, not the one from last night, and another male.

I didn't care what the others thought of me, so I walked straight up to him and said, "Whatever you gave me last night, I want it again." I insisted, looking him straight into his milky eyes.

"Oh yeah? You got any money for it?" He asked. That's right. I'd forgotten that you needed money for drugs. But I didn't care. This was better then anything I'd tried before.

"I don't have any." I said, my face straight. I would get some though. I would. The man beside him smiled and laughed, and the boy smirked.

"Well that's alright. Just blow me then."

Despite how much of a whore I felt like after, I knew that the pain would go away in a few minutes. I didn't have a needle, but he told me I could smoke it and get the same effect. So I did and I was soon in peace.

I felt the warmth and the drowsiness wash over me. Despite the cold I sat in the middle of the park staring up into the sky. "Sirius," I said out load, reaching up at the sky. "I know you're there. And I'm sorry, but I can't do this anymore. I hope you'll forgive me."

I then lay under the stars until I passed out.

I spent the next few weeks selling myself for sex, which I then in turned used to buy heroin from the boy I learn was named Axl. The weeks passed in a blur and I had forgotten what it was like to feel, or even to speak.

The only person I really had any communication with was Axl. He always knew what I wanted. If he himself didn't want anything from me, he'd pass me off to someone he knew who would give me the money that I needed.

At this current time I was walking around in the downtown core of London, my vision hazy for I had done more heroin then I had before. I wasn't scared of over dosing though, I mean, what did I have to lose that I already hadn't?

I kept walking into people, but it really wasn't my fault, it was so busy at this time. People were walking around, too busy with there own lives to notice the once beautiful, not sick looking girl that was high as fuck wandering around, thinking about how she'd managed to destroy her life.

I walked straight into someone, I didn't mean to, but he got into my way. He grabbed my wrist and yelled something at me. It made my head hurt, and I couldn't really understand him. He just kept yelling until he realized that everyone was staring at us. He dragged me away as I stumbled to keep up with him.

He pulled me close to him and when I slammed into his chest, I closed my eyes for a second and when I opened them we were in a different spot, we were outside of what I recognized to be the Malfoy manor.


	6. Chapter 6

I hope everyone likes this one )

* * *

Saving Ginny Weasley

"What the FUCK do you think you're doing?" He said yelling at me. The drugs were starting to were off. My head hurt, so bad. He had brought me inside, I vaguely remember screaming as he carried me into his house.

I fell to my knees, my hands over my ears and my eyes squeezed shut. "SHUT UP!" I yelled. My head hurt so much. This was it, I was dying. I fell onto the ground on my side crying and screaming. I was dying. I was dying. I was dying.

"Get UP Ginny!" Draco yelled as he grabbed my wrists and pulled me up. Her threw me over his shoulders and carried me into a large lavishly furnished room. He dropped me onto one of the couches for a minute and yelled, "Milly!" A house elf appeared.

"Yes master, How can I serve master?" The house elf said bowing at his feet. When I was younger I had always been fascinated by house elves. I thought they were cute, now the creature scared and disgusted me.

"GET IT AWAY! GET IT AWAY!" I screamed over and over again, rolling around on the couch my head aching with pain. I was going to throw up again. I could feel it.

I stumbled to my feet, "Bathroom." I was barely able to speak the words, before I doubled over in pain. I felt Draco's arms wrap around my waist and he pulled me up and took me to the bathroom. I fell over the toilet bowl and began heaving over top of it until I threw up three times and collapsed onto the bathroom floor.

Usually, I would be embarrassed at such behavior, but at this time, I only had one thing on my mind, _more. _I knew it would make all the pain go away. My mind was swimming and I couldn't concentrate on what was going on around me.

Suddenly, I felt myself on a different surface, it took me ten minutes to realize it was Draco Malfoy's lap. After that, it took me a little longer to realize he was stroking my hair and talking quietly to me.

It felt like my head was bleeding. Not outside, but internally. It hurt so much. "It hurts." I cried. "It hurts so much." I wasn't even sure what I was talking about. I wasn't sure if I was talking about emotional or physical pain anymore. I wasn't sure about anything anymore.

"Shhhh. I know Ginny, I know." Draco said softly. He picked me up off the floor and carried me. I wasn't sure for how long or where we were talking. I was vaguely aware that at one point he was carrying me up a flight of stairs.

I felt myself be dropped onto a bed. It was so soft. It was so nice and I relaxed immediately. I heard him step out of the room and the familiar pop of a house elf appariating. "Milly. Please bring me some hot tea."

"Yes master." The house elf said and there was the pop again. I was starting to slip into unconsciousness before I heard the pop again. I heard people talking in hushed whispers. The door opened again when Draco entered the room. He placed the tea on a bedside table and gently shook me.

"Ginny? Ginny sit up. This will make you feel better." He said. I pushed myself slowly into a sitting position, ignoring the stiffness of my body. Draco picked up the glass and held it to my lips. I took one sip, the warmth making me feel better. I took another sip and another until it was all gone.

I lay back down and fell asleep with Draco Malfoy holding my hand.

* * *

I woke up the next morning, feel disgusting but better then yesterday. My first feeling was the craving for heroin. I needed it, but I also needed a way to get away from Draco. He was sitting beside the bed, his eyes closed, slumped over in his chair.

He obviously wasn't in a very deep sleep because when I sat up and the bed made a slight creaking noise, he sat up looking at me with half closed eyes. He immediately blinked over and over until he was awake.

"Ginny, you're awake." He said quietly. I nodded. His face was soft looking at first but it changed into a glare. "Would you like to explain yourself Ginerva?" He sounded almost like a parent, disappointed in there child waiting for an explanation for their wrong doing.

I looked away, to ashamed to answer. What did he expect me to say? 'I'm Sorry Draco. I hadn't expected you to care too much about my drug addiction. It was inconsiderate of me not to take into account how kind you've been to me these past few years when I decided to shoot up to get rid of my pain.' Yeah right.

Draco sighed. "I've dealt with this shit before, with Amber." He said, acting as if I should know who Amber is. "And I don't want you to end up like her. No one deserves that kind of fate."

"Amber?" I asked, turning back to him. I gave him a confused look. I searched my brain for the name Amber but nothing came up. I wonder who he's talking about.

Draco also gave me a confused look, but then it seemed like it all suddenly made sense to him. "Amber. The girl with the sparkling eyes." Oh, her. I nodded in understanding. Draco sighed

"Let me explain. In my early years of Hogwarts, Blaise was not my best friend, it was Amber. In the second year, her parents died and she had to stop going to school, she attended Beauxbatons. She was happy, she hated her parents and with them gone her behavior got way out of control. It started out with smoking weed and escalated into much, much more. She was doing heavy drugs every single night.

"I tried to get her to stop but she just wouldn't. We kept fighting until the day came where I realized she was changed. She was an addict and she only cared about drugs. I gave up on her, and I hate the person she's become. She's not the same person, The new Amber killed my Amber, and I'll never forgive her for that. I've seen what drugs can do to you, and I think you're learning what it can do Ginny." He finished quietly.

So he knew the girl. And they'd been friends. It was a terrible story, but I couldn't help the craving that was still burning inside of me, and at this point I realized I'd lie, cheat, and steal to have drugs. Even if it meant lying to the one and only person who really seemed to care at the moment.

"I'm sorry Draco, it was just so hard with him gone." I said, crying for effect. It wasn't to hard, after all I was thinking about Sirius.

"It's alright Ginny. I'm here for you." I felt a sharp pain in my chest, and I knew it would hurt me to betray him, but it was for the better, or at least that's what I though.


End file.
